One of the mysteries I’ve pondered over the years is the difference between love and hate. I’ve heard many answers to this, most of which didn’t sit right with me.
Some people call them opposites. I get what they mean, but I don’t agree. Both are intense emotional fixations. To me, the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s apathy or indifference.
Whenever anyone told me that love is good and hate is bad, I’d then wonder what the difference between good and bad is.
Besides, I’ve felt love in a bad way. And what crusader, hero or champion doesn’t hate the things they seek to destroy?
It’s not a question of attraction versus aversion. Fear can make you run away, but both love and hate can compel you towards something.
And you might notice the line between them is thin. Two cultural clichés are the two people who hate each other and fall in love, and the loving couple with a messy separation who turn on each other.
I’m not going to ask if there even is a difference.
Clearly there is.
But what is it?
This is far from a full answer, but one important difference is this:
Love opens your mind, while hate closes it.
When you love someone – in a romantic sense, with professional respect and everything in between – you listen to what they say. You think about, reflect and consider their point of view. Even if you don’t agree with it, you strive to understand it.
But you never listen to The Enemy’s lies and propaganda. That is the path to folly and madness, after all.
If you want an open mind, capable of growth, creativity and happiness, then be careful what emotions you indulge in. I know too many people who browse the news, hunting for a manufactured target to direct their outrage against. They see the world as a chance to get angry, be the victim and wallow in pity.
Every minute they do this worsens them.
Whereas love, from friendship to family to community to romance to admiration – it opens you to new things. It enriches and strengthens you.
This is not an invitation to be naïve. You don’t have to tolerate anything you shouldn’t. Be selective with who you admire, respect and adore.
But don’t be too selective.
You can train your mind to be more open – to growth, to opportunities, to everything good – by focusing on love.
Think about people you care about. Wish them well. Want them to be happy.
In time, expand this attitude towards colleagues, associates and people you don’t know well.
Then wish strangers, in the privacy of your mind, every good thing they ever want.
Once you do this, you become automatically hypnotic. Whether you’re trained or not, people will simply feel good after talking to you. Problems dissolve in your presence and everything becomes better.
That’s something worth aspiring to.
This attitude is fuel for and enhanced by self-hypnosis.
Did you know that my new self-hypnosis guide – with over twice the value of the original – is on sale during August?
But tick tock, my friend. Time has a way of slipping from us. So hurry on over: