If you want to transform your sex life, there’s a concept in hypnosis called ‘going first’. The idea is that whatever you want the subject to feel, you need to feel first. If you want them to be confident, then be confident. If you want them to believe that they can overcome their problems, then believe they can overcome their problems.
You want them to like and trust you, so like and trust them.
Call it mirror neurons. Call it empathy. It doesn’t matter. The point is that they will notice your state and experience it too.
Probably 80% of the art is in this concept. If you can’t master your own mental experiences, you can’t influence someone else’s.
To be a hypnotist is to know that you are bigger than the client’s problems. Once you know it, they will know it too. Problems are only problems because they seem insurmountable. Show that they aren’t and they tend to resolve themselves.
What does this have to do with your sex life?
Let’s apply this idea to seduction. Ask yourself this: what problem are you solving by seducing them?
Seriously, take a moment to ask the question. It’s important. I’ll wait.
If the problem this solves your loneliness, your desires, your need for intimacy… guess what? It ain’t gonna work. No one is going to have sex with you because you want to. They’ll do it because they want to.
I mean, you’re not buying cereal here. You’re interacting with another human being. Their needs are as relevant as yours are.
So flip the script. Go first. Show that you have the solution to their problem.
If they are lonely, then embody a sense of connection. If they want romance, then radiate romance. You want them to like and trust you, so like and trust them first. And like and trust yourself.
What if you don’t know what they want? Then here’s a super-secret trick hypnotists use to learn their subjects’ deepest desires:
Talk to them. Pay attention. Be genuinely curious. They’ll tell you what they want in the first few minutes. People broadcast much more information than they realise (ask any mentalist). Most people won’t pick up on it. If you do, though, it’s an instant connection. They’ll wonder how you know more about them – the real them – than most of their friends do.
This is not the solution that some of you were hoping for. Hypnotic tricks to improve your sex life? You may have expected something closer to mind control or brainwashing. If anything, this is the opposite: you’re changing your state and valuing them as a person.
There are other hypnosis and NLP-based tricks out there. Here’s the thing: none of them will improve your sex life if you ignore these principles. If you don’t consider their needs, they won’t listen to you, so your super fancy embedded suggestions won’t work.
And if you show that you add value to their lives? You could talk about tax law and still win them over.
Control your mental state and you will be successful. It’s true for your sex life, career, sports and anything else you set your mind to. Why do you think so many leading CEOs, athletes and creative thinkers meditate?
All meditation helps. Some types train your mind better than others. Improve your focus, charisma and vitality with my new eBook. Harness your mind better by downloading your free copy: