My worst heartbreaks, my best strategy

I’ve had a few broken hearts over the years.

The worst of them have been recently, over the last few years or so.

I won’t go into the details. If it were just about me, I would, but a breakup always involves another person.

But I will say this:

During some of the darker moments – and not even the darkest – I had the intense urge to burn my life down. I wanted to walk away from my home, my friends, my family, my businesses, my hobbies – everything.

The urge to disappear into the countryside, permanently severing all ties, was strong.

I felt it, even though I knew that wouldn’t have helped. Cutting myself off from everything familiar and supportive was a mad impulse. Trying to rebuild everything from scratch wouldn’t have been fun.

Even so, I wanted to do it.

It felt like I needed to do it.

I’m not knocking the desire for freedom. Was this that, though? Or a craving to punish myself and everyone else for all the horrible stuff in my life?

If you want to know how I write so much, it’s because of obsession. It’s one of my greatest mental strengths, but when it fixates on something negative…

What I’m saying is, if you have a broken heart… I get it. I don’t know what you’re going through but I sure as manure get it.

How did I keep myself from permanently wrecking my life, when every impulse except common sense told me to?

I’ve picked up a few tricks along the way.

I remember buying groceries one day, torn between dual desires to be around people and to tell them all to eff off, when I used an easy (but absurdly powerful) technique.

It was like flipping a switch.

Just like that, I felt human again.

Obviously, that’s not the end of the story. “I never felt sad again!” would be a suspicious claim here. I might as well go all out: “and ten minutes later I was married to supermodel twins!”

No, obviously, that feeling came back… a few days later.

Which means for a moment’s effort, I bought a few days of relief.

It was weaker then – more of an inkling than an overwhelming urge. So I used the technique again and it went away.

The gaps between these feelings grew longer. The sensations themselves grew weaker.

Now, some of you with the basics of psychology under your belt are yelling at your screens right now. “Suppressing bad feelings doesn’t make them go away, ya idiot!”

Hi, hello, you must be new here. I’m all about unearthing forgotten pain, processing it and moving on. I’d rather keep suffering than bury the pain, leaving it to fester beneath the surface…

This technique doesn’t do that.

Rather than routing around the network of neurons, leaving it there to fire up one day, this dissolves it.

Not completely, it’s true, but enough to stop feeling it in the moment… and to permanently weaken it.

Other people will tell you… you can get through this.

And they’re right.

Let me tell you that you can get through this faster and healthier than you’ve ever imagined.

You can feel better today.

Read more about this technique, plus everything else included in Heartbreak Panacea, right here:

P.S. To celebrate the launch, use code HEARTBREAK during April 2021 to get 25% off the price.

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