Personal growth through spite

Okay, this isn’t the most mature response.

Or maybe it is? I’ll let you judge…

But I was listening to a podcast with a guy who was rubbing me the wrong way. He was a smart guy who clearly knew his stuff, but I was resisting what he said.

I think it’s because a lot of his advice comes from an attitude I don’t agree with.

Whatever, each to their own.

Anyway, he said something along the lines of:

People need to go outside and get into nature more. We spend too long sitting around our homes, disconnected from our environment.

Now, I couldn’t agree more with that. We’d solve a lot of physical, mental and social problems if we all got out into nature.

(In fact, I have a bonus for Monster Mind Edukaré owners on that topic coming out soon…)

With this, he was preaching to the choir.

Even so, because I was pushing back on everything else he was saying… I proceeded to plonk my butt in a chair and write for hours, instead of going outside like I planned.

I know, I know.

It’s childish.

I shouldn’t let another folk influence my decision and mental state.

Etc etc et freaking cetera.

But, whatever. I’m human and I respond to what other humans do. I could shut that down, I could continue not being a psychopath, but I can’t do both.

In any case, this was a useful response. In the past, I might have grizzled and grumbled for a bit. I might have indulged in some TV or video games to clear my mental palate. Instead, I thought “screw you buddy” and got down to work.

The end result is a whole lot better, I can say that much.

And this is more how I want to live my life. I could switch certain emotions off and certain mental states on. I know more than a few tricks on how to do that.

But just because I can, should I?

Emotions are clear signals from your unconscious. Sometimes they’re useful, like getting angry to defend yourself. Sometimes they’re not, like getting angry when someone cuts you off in traffic. Either way, it’s your unconscious saying something.

If it’s harmful, then it’s up to you to engage your unconscious and explore why you do it.

Everything else, though?

Your unconscious has a reason for sharing it. So instead of getting into the habit of ignoring your intuition, why not use what you have?

I turned spite into hours of productive work. In the past, I’ve turned anger into action, sadness into self-compassion and exhaustion into creative thinking.

There’s nothing wrong with you. You probably think that a lot – “if only I were smarter/more confident/better with money/better with women/happy with my lot…” – so I’ll say it again, there’s nothing wrong with you. The reason you’re not improving is you think there is, so you’re trying to change what you are instead of using what you are.

If you want to really improve, then step one is to rebuild your relationship with your unconscious. When it sends something you don’t like, whether that’s a craving for something bad, a nasty memory or a negative emotion, work with it. Figure out what your unconscious means when it gives you this, then figure out what to do with it.

There’s nothing wrong with you and you have everything you need.

It’s simply a question of engaging with your unconscious.

And the best way to do that – by far – is hypnosis.

Even if you struggle to meditate, even if you think you “can’t be hypnotised” (you can!) give it a go.

You’ll quickly find all the resources you need among the worst things in your mind.

My usual reminder: you can begin to experience hypnosis right here:

/monster

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